“Sorry, I have a clingy and feverish assassin on my lap. I’ll call you back when I’ve convinced him that a cold doesn’t mean he’s dying.”
“Why are there WEAPONS in my bathroom?”
“Breaking news: twenty-two year old man has blister.” “It matters because it’s baseball!” “That doesn’t mean it’s not funny.”
“Can we detour into a universe that isn’t built off the backs of everyone’s dead mothers?”
“You know it’s July, right?” “I don’t let the weather dictate my sartorial choices.”
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